It’s only human to want to amass a fortune, and the quicker the better. Anyone that says they’d prefer to scratch out a living and barely make ends meet is what Italians call “un bugiardo.”
Investing in the stock market is one way to attempt the speedy accumulation of wealth, although as with casinos, it seems the house always wins. We are repeatedly humbled by forces beyond our control, and timing the market only works for government officials, corporate insiders and that neighbor who smugly claims they got out “just before the crash,” even though they’re still driving a 2003 Impala.
Playing the lottery can also provide a windfall — though the odds of winning are smaller than a neutrino.* Granted it does promote daydreaming as you imagine the possibility of a better life. But you have no control over those little numbered balls vacuumed from the basket; your two bucks are better spent at the racetrack, where at least you can tear up your ticket while seeing the beauty of horses in full gallop.
Which brings us to an activity that is affordable, offers you exercise and plenty of fresh air, and gives you the opportunity to add to your net worth. And that’s the search for buried treasure. Finding old coins, jewelry and relics from past generations is a heck of lot healthier than sitting around staring at a stock ticker. Why, a 1936 Buffalo nickel is worth more than 100 times it’s value today, and is sure to keep going skyward.*
All you need is a sense of adventure and the visual acuity to spot the precious items in your path. Of course, you’ll have a lot more success if you deploy your own metal detector!We recommend a lightweight model that’s easy on the back, with enough features to make your search a fortunate one. Having done the research, we prefer the Garrett AT Pro. It’s an all-terrain detector that has 40 different settings to help you uncover various types of ferrous metals. And like the more expensive CTX 3030, the AT Pro is fully submersible up to 10 feet.
Venturing outdoors with your metal detector is a reward in itself, leading to aerobic fitness, healthier heart, improved circulation and flexibility, and increased vitamin D levels. Even if you find nothing, you’ve found nature — and she’s the greatest teacher of all.
So take a couple bucks from the clutches of Wall Street and invest in a metal detector. You’ll be glad you did.
*Neutrinos are the smallest massive particles currently measured and catalogued. The average characteristic size is r2 = n × 10−33 cm2 (n × 1 nanobarn), where n = 3.2 for electron neutrino, n = 1.7 for muon neutrino and n = 1.0 for tau neutrino.
**Remember to consult with a numismatic expert before polishing your treasures to a gleaming shine. The value of the old coins you uncover can be destroyed with too much scrubbing and scratching.
Feeling jaded? Stuck in a rut? Bemoaning a lack of interesting stimuli? This could be just the break you’re looking for.
Studies have shown that people who are easily bored are constantly looking for new ways to fight the boredom, and that makes them more likely to turn to risky behaviors in an attempt to make their environments more interesting. So is this bad? It is if you decide to go skydiving without a parachute, or watch streaming video for 92 hours straight, or take more than your prescribed dosage of Parnazadanol.*
But by taking the “right risks,” boredom can be the fuel that sparks fresh ideas. None other than Fyodor Dostoevsky, the celebrated Russian author, believed that boredom was a precursor to great creativity. Despite his Slavic propensity for gloom, in this regard Fyodor definitely exhibited SuperOptimist tendencies.
All you need is the patience to not freak out when boredom arrives. Stay with the feeling, soak in it awhile, and then watch your imagination begin to look for an escape hatch. It’s in this mental search for escape that inspired thinking can be found.
The SuperOptimist realizes that the mind will always seek a way out from the cage of boredom eventually. Even if the route is up over the craggy Himalayas, and each step is hard, hard, work, the mind will seek it nonetheless. Just think how good it will feel to climb up out of boredom and conquer that mountain.
Take that first step now and we’ll see you at the top!
*We made this up. But it sounds like a new pharmaceutical breakthrough, doesn’t it?
Is rushing out to buy a closet full of face masks really the best way to confront your fear of catching the deadly COVID-19?
We think not.
For one thing, masks are really intended for those doing the spreading of disease, not those who are trying to avoid it. They offer little guarantee of preventing the illness due to the size of the microbes that can penetrate the mask (not to mention people’s habit of removing the masks to touch, scratch, and poke at their face).
But perhaps most important, these masks make you look like you’re already on your way to the hospital — or worse. Just by putting one on, you’re admitting you’re scared to death of getting sick. This fear and stress is a real turn-off to your immune system, and can cause you to be more susceptible to catching the virus, not less!
For a SuperOptimist, a face mask is not the weapon of choice for confronting the coronavirus. Facing a pandemic we have no control over, we recommend confronting it head on — by wearing the helmet of your choice.*
Whether it be Roman Gladiator, Viking, vintage leather football, World War II infantry, or standard construction model, sporting a good, solid helmet at all times makes it clear to the world that a deadly virus will not intimidate you, no siree. A helmet says you’re not to be messed with by airborne particles (or anything else, for that matter).
Not only that, the confidence you’ll exhibit wearing a helmet will have your colleagues at work taking a step back in order to let you pass. That’s a good thing, as the farther they are away from you, the less likely you’ll pick up their germs. Plus if you live in an urban environment, a helmet will protect you from falling debris from construction sites, of which there are many.
So rather than quarantine yourself in public behind a surgical mask, we advise you to wash your hands frequently, avoid close contact with sick people, and grab yourself a helmet. Now get out there and show those microbes of malfeasance who’s boss!
*While we subscribe to time-honored holistic methods of healthcare, we are not licensed physicians. Ask your doctor if SuperOptimism is right for you.
Democrats, take heart.
Sure, you’ve had a lousy week (to go with a lousy three years), with the Senate acquittal of your most hated foe coupled with the Iowa caucus debacle making you look like the political equivalent of the New York Knicks.
So why is this great news for every blue stater out there? Take a moment to consider the “pendulum effect.” Also called the pendulum law, it was discovered by Galileo in 1602 and describes the regular, swinging motion of a pendulum by the action of gravity and acquired momentum.
Much like Signor Galilei’s pendulum experiments, trends in politics have swung back and forth between opposite extremes for the last few decades. From George H.W Bush to Bill Clinton. From Clinton to George W. Bush. From W. to Barrack Obama. And from Barry to Don. Man, that pendulum swings more than Benny Goodman ever did.