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Strike out on your own.

As Babe Ruth said, “Never let the fear of striking out get in your way.”  He never let the naysayers prevent him from approaching the plate with a swagger and a smile.  Yet plenty of people wanted to see him fail, and fail he did.  Not only was the Babe called the “Sultan of Swat,” he was also known as the “King of Strikeouts.” In fact, he led the American League in whiffs five times, and accumulated 1,330 of them in his career. If he had been afraid of getting beaten at the plate, he never would have launched 714 dingers over the outfield fence.  So take a tip from the Big Bambino; dare to fail, and laugh about it when you do.  Then get back in the batter’s box and see what happens next!

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Open doors for others. Walk through them yourself.

If you find it getting stuffy in your home, office, car or — most especially — cranium, take a cue from Aldous Huxley and open some doors.

Now we don’t advocate taking drugs to break open the head.  Rather, we recommend literally opening the nearest door, walking out of the confines you are currently in and towards a meditation center, nature preserve, or art studio.* All are more genuine ways of breaking through to the other side, without the nasty side effects.

As Aldous said, “The ordinary waking consciousness…is by no means the only form of consciousness, nor in all circumstances the best. Insofar as he transcends his ordinary self and his ordinary mode of awareness, the mystic is able to enlarge his vision, to look more deeply into the unfathomable miracle of existence.”

So open all the doors.  And windows too.  Especially if there’s a nice breeze to be enjoyed.

*Huxley himself began practicing meditation years before he experimented with substances.  

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Yawn like a leader!

Some consider a public yawn to be a sign of ill-breeding, poor manners, and worst of all, an inability to control oneself.  Nonsense!  Your yawn is actually a sign that you are deep thinker, a hard worker, and, dare we say it, a leader in your field.  Here’s why:

Scientists at Princeton University postulate that yawning plays a vital role in your well-being by cooling your brain.  When you start to yawn, the stretching of the jaw increases blood flow to your cranium, while in turn forcing downward flow of spinal fluid.  Air breathed into the mouth during the yawn chills these fluids, like a car’s radiator cooling the engine.

So the next time you feel a yawn coming on, don’t stifle it. Don’t hide it behind a hand or elbow. Let your yawn announce itself, jaws agape, eyed clenched shut.  Whatever sound that arises within the cave-like expanse of your mouth set asunder, let it echo as if it were a note ringing out from the stage of the Metropolitan Opera.

End your yawn with a satisfying sigh and a smack of the lips. Should anyone ask why you’re taking so much pleasure in the act, explain to them the science behind the activity.   Of course you’re yawning!  You’re simply cooling your brain off, since yours has been working overtime.   Suggest to them that they’re not yawning because they don’t have as many world-changing ideas as you.   Watch as they suddenly start following your lead and yawning like crazy.

You are a leader! A leader of yawns!  Now isn’t that satisfying?

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Show your ghosts the door.

According to Mr. Miller, “Once you give up the ghost, everything follows with dead certainty, even in the midst of chaos.”  So if you’re tired of trying to do something because you aren’t getting what you want from your efforts, try giving up that particular ghost today, and see if it doesn’t bring everything into focus.  If not, invite a fresh ghost to take up residence inside your person.  At least you’ll be haunted by the specter of something new.

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You are better than LeBron James.

LeBron James is six foot nine and a superior athlete.  He’s also a good pitchman, an interesting celebrity, and from what we hear just sank an amazing buzzer-beater last night.  In addition, he earns a ton of dollars, gets feted at awards banquets, and is lavished with the trappings of a King (which happens to be his nickname).

Meanwhile, you get the stink eye for showing up to your latest appointment 10 minutes late, due to commuting on a rail service that is two cars short yet again due to your state’s budget crisis.

Society may want to rob you of your superiority to Mr. James by placing him on a pedestal. And yet, the fact is, you are better than LeBron James. Even if his balance is so good he could carry a tea cup on his head through a hurricane.

But you’re the only you that exists on this planet, which counts for a lot. LeBron knows that size and athletic talent is not the secret of his success. It’s motivation. As James himself notes, “Greatness is defined by how much you want to put into what you do.”  So while you might not be able to jump as high as LeBron, your motivation and desire have no physical limitations. The sky’s the limit.

Besides, right now LeBron James may have already come down from last night’s victory and is dealing with some petty legal matter or pesky interview request, while you’re able to wander outside and enjoy a plate of crinkle cut french fries. Who’s got it better now?

So up your game, today. The sooner you look yourself in the mirror and say, “Damnit, LeBron James has nothing on me,” the sooner you’ll start receiving compliments on your improved posture and confident demeanor. You may even school LeBron in your particular field of endeavor and show him what real success looks like.  And you can share your fries with him, if you are the magnanimous sort.

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Applaud everyone. Yourself included.

Performers expect to hear applause after they do their job.  In fact, standing ovations have become the norm at entertainment events. But why should this be the case for actors and musicians only?

Getting applauded feels great, and everyone should experience that acknowledgement of their effort.  Hotel maids, traffic cops, baristas, coders, heavy equipment operators, escorts…they all deserve a rousing cheer for a job well done.

And while you’re at it, give yourself a big hand for whatever you’re doing right now. Whether it’s successfully delivering a power point presentation to a grim boardroom, navigating the bowels of Penn Station to make a train, or cleaning out your hall closet, the one you haven’t touched in 12 years — three cheers for you!  Remember, you deserve it!*

*The researchers at Uppsala University in Sweden have discovered that applause is contagious, so the more you give yourself, the more others will join in.

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What Mother Bush taught us.

In the midst of all the tributes to the former First Lady and mother of “W.”, we couldn’t help but wonder how this woman survived in the midst of two Georges and a Jeb.  So we did a little research and found this quote from her:

“The darn trouble with cleaning the house is it gets dirty the next day anyway. So skip a week if you have to.”

It seems that Babs overcame society’s push towards having everything neat and tidy (which, as we all know, life never is). One could also extrapolate this to include work, eating vegetables, and returning phone calls from the IRS.  We applaud her for turning her back on such small-minded thinking in favor of letting her freak flag fly — as well as not dying her hair or getting any botox (that we know of.)*

*As for her politics, well…as Babs also said, “I don’t like attacking.” So we’ll leave it at that.

 

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Give yourself a gold star.

Society has bred us to be eager for an acknowledgment from others.  We work extra hard for the praise that comes from a job well done.  And yet when one steps back from the daily striving, much of what we labor to accomplish is merely an illusion, as are the bon mots that come with it.

Pick a profession.  How much is satisfying about the job, and how much is simply busywork?  When the boss says “good work” on a power point presentation, does that overcome the inner suspicion that 12 hours spent unearthing stock photos of satisfied consumers was a waste of time?

To set a goal that doesn’t get you a pat on the head (and may never) takes courage, especially in a world where many people behave like the proverbial student waiting for the teacher to anoint them with a gold star.

Here’s an idea.   Don’t rely on others to acknowledge your effort.  Give yourself props, and lots of them.  For example, tomorrow when you wake up, if you make it out of bed, give yourself a gold star.  And another one for brushing your teeth.  And another for making yourself breakfast.  This way, you’ll be having a four-star day even before you leave the house!

Question: why did facebook create “likes” instead of gold stars?  We recommend they change this to a more universally recognized system of praise.

 

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Embrace the Dunning-Kruger Effect.

Ignorance is, in fact, a blissful state.  This theory was proven by social psychologists David Dunning and Justin Kruger, who in their landmark 1999 study, found that people who have virtually no skill in something often rate themselves as near experts.  Why?  Because they have no idea how much they don’t know, and how much they still have to learn.

Now the Dunning-Kruger effect might be something to avoid if you’re interested in becoming a thoracic surgeon, industrial architect, or Supreme Court justice.  But for the rest of us, embracing a lack of  “structured learning” may lead to fresh and exciting work.

Picasso himself said that it took him four years to paint like Raphael, but a lifetime to paint like a child.  Why is that something to strive for?  One could argue that a five-year-old has no Yale-educated intelligence about art.  And yet, how magical are the paintings a 5-year-old brings home to hang on the refrigerator?

Buddhists strive for this kind of openness to life, minus judgment or criticism, calling it “beginner’s mind.” They practice detachment from thought in order to experience each moment with a fresh perspective.

Perhaps the Dunning-Kruger Effect isn’t something to sidestep, but to adopt.  Enjoying a bit of “illusory superiority” can’t hurt if you’re wielding a paintbrush, or writing a poem. Though the opposite is true if you’re operating a 15-story construction crane, or facing your Thesis Examination Committee at MIT.

Or serving as President of the United States.

 

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Whirl like a Dervish for better health!

Stuck on a problem at work? Feeling trapped in a relationship? Wishing you could beat the wave of hopelessness and fatigue that arrives every afternoon at 3? We advise you to take a lesson from the Sufis and become your own “spin doctor.”

By cranking up the stereo, focusing on the heavens, and turning around and around in a tight circle repeatedly, you can reach “Kemal”, the source of all perfection. How does this happen? For one thing, you get a vigorous workout that raises your endorphins. For another, your mind can’t focus on your egocentric issues when it’s focused trying to keep you upright.

Many dervishes start their practice with a cup of strong Turkish coffee, which we heartily subscribe to. And if you’re looking for an appropriate song to start your fancy footwork, try “Peşrev in maqām acem.” This one’s guaranteed to get you spinning like a top!

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