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Run towards what scares you.

Modern homo sapiens first walked the Earth about 50,000 years ago. Since then, more than 108 billion members of our species have been born. Which means 101 billion have already croaked, kicked the bucket, or bitten the dust.* You will too. Does that scare you? It shouldn’t.

Why do we fear death? Mainly for selfish reasons. “I need more time to finish my masterpiece!” “I’ve never visited Nome or Kiev!” “I was promised a cushy retirement if I played by the rules for 40 years!” “I am an important __________(your professional status here) and the world needs me to continue!”

Except the universe doesn’t care about your family, your goals, your summer trip to the Cape. If it’s time for a flood (or earthquake, or pandemic, or meteor) to hit, then that takes center stage — and you’re reduced to an insignificant carbon-based life form who may not survive.

How curious! How mysterious! How perfect!

The truth is, most of us quarantine ourselves each day from the realities of nature. We’ve been socialized to embrace the sweeter things in life (corn syrup, air conditioning, leather recliners), and shy away from the dark, unruly forces we can’t control.  But that negates a huge part of existence.

That’s why now is a swell time to spend some quality hours embracing the source of your deepest anxiety. Invite it to tea, and offer it a finger sandwich. The more you embrace it as a part of you, and give it respect, the less it will snarl and bite and render you helpless.

Once you and your fear are on speaking terms, you’ll realize that your anxiety may be unfounded. Are you really in mortal danger at this very moment? And if so, what’s wrong with that?

Let’s take a lesson from Mexico’s “Dia de Muertos.” Rather than fearing the reaper, why not joyfully celebrate this natural part of the human cycle, and toast the memories of departed ancestors. May fear take a backseat to fiesta!

*According to the primary texts on Buddhist psychology, fear is not even inherent in what is known as basic mind. What is inherent? Clear seeing, spaciousness, pure awareness. Of course, it takes practice to think this way. Or not think, as the case may be.

 

 

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Spontaneous celebration? Count us in!

Today the SuperOptimist turns 141.* (Not in years, but in columns placed on the world wide web.) Naturally, this is cause for revelry, so we’d like to invite you to join us as we dig in to a generous slice of our favorite pie.

At the same time, we pause to reflect on the great gift bestowed upon us as transmitters of SuperOptimist thought. We were first visited by this powerful force in 2006, which resulted in a book that offered a contrarian take on what most humans refer to as “problems.”

Secrets of the SuperOptimist

We thought we had completed our mission with the book’s publication and subsequent second edition, and spent the next 11 years practicing SuperOptimism like a figure skater practices a triple lutz, or an equestrian practices dressage. Yet the spirit channel contacted us again in the spring of 2019, perhaps in anticipation of a major world event which would disrupt our lives the following year.

So we recommitted to writing down the signals we received, sent during the wee hours via lucid dreaming, walking meditation, and glimpses into the space-time continuum.  And now, there may be much more the SuperOptimist wishes to impart to help people survive — and thrive — in this decade and beyond.

We will continue to share these wisdom transmissions, while celebrating each day as if there is no tomorrow. The fact that death can come quick or slow, that money can evaporate after years of saving, that your team may not win the next three-game series  — it’s living in the mystery that makes life an exciting, if unpredictable, adventure.

Finally, we celebrate you for spending some time with us. We hope you will continue to enjoy more slices of our pie in the future.

*At a time when friends have unexpectedly taken flight due to something smaller than the smallest bacterium, we dedicate this column to Bob Levine, one very cool dude who brought joy and humor to many.  

 

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Working from home? Here are spirits to guide you.

Another week, another 168 hours stuck in the same confines. And the end is not yet in sight: While hope reigns supreme, some experts believe this period of social distancing will last for months.

A human being can’t be faulted for experiencing a sense of restlessness, even claustrophobia, as one turn of the clock bleeds into the next. So the question becomes, “How can I make this period of sequestration a positive and rewarding experience ?” It’s not unheard of; some people have spent many years in isolation, having chosen that lifestyle.

One way is to step outside yourself and reframe your view of the current situation. Good things have already emerged from this short period in our history — a balm for the environment, reduced commuting time, inventive new ways to cook beans and rice. But perhaps the greatest blessing of all is that this can be the moment where we “go within,” turning our focus from the outside world to the wonderful adventure inside our own heads.

We think you’ll find inspiration in the examples set by some of the world’s foremost thinkers, who embraced solitude as a refreshing change from the frantic pace of the world. We humbly offer this audio recording of a guided meditation and seance performed at SuperOptimist headquarters to help you to embrace the moment at hand and do your best work now.*

 

(pictured above, from left to right: SuperOptimists Freida, Lars, Walter, Angelique, John, Lulu, Nathaniel and Martin)

This is merely a taste of what is out there for you to experience. We encourage you to continue the practice of summoning helpful spirits to your side. You don’t need a room full of friends to make contact; even while keeping your own counsel you can perform the ritual on your own.

And should you be interested in contacting the spirits we’ve befriended, the best way is to read their works. Once they see you delving into their pages, they’re more likely to pay you a personal visit.

 

 

 

Here’s to a memorable week (or eight) of inner travel, illumination and adventure!

*Special thanks to our resident medium, John Burlinson, for performing this valuable service for our readers.

 

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Feeling cooped up? Feast your eyes on this.

Note: Over the next few weeks, The SuperOptimist will be providing a series of experiments one can conduct on themselves at home. They are designed for the curious, the seekers of experience, and those who wish to pass the time in novel and thought-provoking ways. 

While biding your time in your own personal quarantine, the walls can feel like they’re closing in.

But maybe it’s not the walls — it’s the color.

Color can play a big role in your mood. So when SuperOptimists get a bit squirrelly, we stare at the color blue. It’s a scientific fact that blue makes you feel safe and relaxed, and no wonder. It actually causes the body to create chemicals that are calming. When you marvel at the ocean, it’s not just the waves that mesmerize. Same with the sky.

Which color blue appeals to you? Here’s a few shades to consider:

Blue does such a good job in calming the mind, that after blue lights were installed at Japanese transit stations, there was an 84% decrease in the number of people jumping in front of trains. There was a similar decline in the number of violent crimes when streetlights were converted to blue in Scotland.

So if you’re getting a little edgy wondering whether you’ll be sequestered until 2021, a simple change of light bulbs in a room can transform your crib into a virtual sea of calm.

Then again, pink may be an even better choice. After all, as we are now in our self-imposed prisons, we might take our cue from actual prison wardens who paint holding cells pink. They were inspired by studies conducted by research scientist Alexander Schauss, who created “Baker-Miller Pink” and showed it to reduce criminals’ hostile behavior, although later tests proved inconclusive. The color is also referred to as “Drunk Tank Pink” and inspired an interesting book on how our environments shape our thinking.

In 2017, model Kendall Jenner painted her living room Baker-Miller Pink – and raved about how it made her feel calmer and act as a diet aid.

“Baker-Miller Pink is the only color scientifically proven to calm you AND suppress your appetite. I was like, “I NEED this color in my house!” I then found someone to paint the room and now I’m loving it!”. Want to walk a mile in Kendall’s puffy slippers? Here’s a bucket for you.

*It is important to note that one person’s blue might be another person’s chartreuse. Colors can be subjective, depending on the viewers’ past experiences or cultural differences. So we advise you to experiment with color to find the shade that puts you in the desired state of mind.

**It wasn’t that long ago when little girls were dressed in blue and boys in pink. But this reversed during the middle of last century. While the shift was apparently the result of clothing designers’ tastes, some attribute it to Nazi Germany forcing gay men to wear a pink badge when grouping them as undesirables, thereby tainting the color as “non-masculine” going forward. 

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The news is better in French!

Note: Over the next few weeks, The SuperOptimist will be providing a series of experiments one can conduct on themselves at home. They are designed for the curious, the seekers of experience, and those who wish to pass the time in novel and thought-provoking ways. 

A great way to escape the constant onslaught of news and information, especially in times of crisis, is by turning away from media altogether. But as human beings, we like to be kept company by voices other than the ones inside our heads.

That’s why the SuperOptimist recommends listening to the latest programming in a foreign language that you can’t comprehend. * When you remove the brain’s desire to process and understand each word, you can relax and appreciate the sounds on their own. In another world, these sounds could be coming from aliens. In the spirit world, they could be shamans speaking in tongues. It’s akin to experimental music, or abstract painting.

Let your imagination conjure its own story about what these French folks are talking about.  Being stuck in an elevator? Champions League Football? Cooking pastry?

To pick up the signal, we recommend a nice shortwave radio; one that also doubles as an emergency transponder should the need arise. Hand-cranked and solar powered, it never needs batteries or electricity and can receive signals from as far away as Siberia.

As you begin your new listening experience, here’s a station to get you started. Should you prefer a different language, you’ll find plenty in Spanish, along with Russian, Arabic, Chinese, Polish — even Creole.

*It’s conceivable that after listening for a month or two, you may pick up enough meaning in the words to consider yourself bilingual.

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Restless? World-weary? Disenchanted? We envy you!

Feeling jaded? Stuck in a rut? Bemoaning a lack of interesting stimuli?  This could be just the break you’re looking for. Studies have shown that people who are easily bored are constantly looking for new ways to fight the boredom, and that makes them more likely to turn to risky behaviors in an attempt to make their environments more interesting. So is this bad? It is if you decide to go skydiving without a parachute, or watch streaming video for 92 hours straight, or take more than your prescribed dosage of Parnazadanol.*

But by taking the “right risks,” boredom can be the fuel that sparks fresh ideas. None other than Fyodor Dostoevsky, the celebrated Russian author, believed that boredom was a precursor to great creativity. Despite his Slavic propensity for gloom, in this regard Fyodor definitely exhibited SuperOptimist tendencies.

All you need is the patience to not freak out when boredom arrives. Stay with the feeling, soak in it awhile, and then watch your imagination begin to look for an escape hatch. It’s in this mental search for escape that inspired thinking can be found.

The SuperOptimist realizes that the mind will always seek a way out from the cage of boredom eventually. Even if the route is up over the craggy Himalayas, and each step is hard, hard, work, the mind will seek it nonetheless.  Just think how good it will feel to climb up out of boredom and conquer that mountain.

Take that first step now and we’ll see you at the top!

*We made this up. But it sounds like a new pharmaceutical breakthrough, doesn’t it?

 

 

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Show the virus you mean business.

Is rushing out to buy a closet full of face masks really the best way to confront your fear of catching the deadly COVID-19?

We think not.

For one thing, masks are really intended for those doing the spreading of disease, not those who are trying to avoid it. They offer little guarantee of preventing the illness due to the size of the microbes that can penetrate the mask (not to mention people’s habit of removing the masks to touch, scratch, and poke at their face).

But perhaps most important, these masks make you look like you’re already on your way to the hospital — or worse. Just by putting one on, you’re admitting you’re scared to death of getting sick. This fear and stress is a real turn-off to your immune system, and can cause you to be more susceptible to catching the virus, not less!

For a SuperOptimist, a face mask is not the weapon of choice for confronting the coronavirus. Facing a pandemic we have no control over, we recommend confronting it head on — by wearing the helmet of your choice.*

Whether it be Roman Gladiator, Viking, vintage leather football, World War II infantry, or standard construction model, sporting a good, solid helmet at all times makes it clear to the world that a deadly virus will not intimidate you, no siree. A helmet says you’re not to be messed with by airborne particles (or anything else, for that matter).

Not only that, the confidence you’ll exhibit wearing a helmet will have your colleagues at work taking a step back in order to let you pass. That’s a good thing, as the farther they are away from you, the less likely you’ll pick up their germs. Plus if you live in an urban environment, a helmet will protect you from falling debris from construction sites, of which there are many.

So rather than quarantine yourself in public behind a surgical mask, we advise you to wash your hands frequently, avoid close contact with sick people, and grab yourself a helmet.  Now get out there and show those microbes of malfeasance who’s boss!

*While we subscribe to time-honored holistic methods of healthcare, we are not licensed physicians. Ask your doctor if SuperOptimism is right for you.

 

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In politics as in life, the pendulum swings both ways.

Democrats, take heart.

Sure, you’ve had a lousy week (to go with a lousy three years), with the Senate acquittal of your most hated foe coupled with the Iowa caucus debacle making you look like the political equivalent of the New York Knicks.

One might argue that this week we hit extreme Republicanism, with the Donald’s triumphant victory lap contrasted by Nancy Pelosi “tearing up” at the conclusion of Tuesday’s State of the Union.

So why is this great news for every blue stater out there? Take a moment to consider the “pendulum effect.” Also called the pendulum law, it was discovered by Galileo in 1602 and describes the regular, swinging motion of a pendulum by the action of gravity and acquired momentum. 

Much like Signor Galilei’s pendulum experiments, trends in politics have swung back and forth between opposite extremes for the last few decades. From George H.W Bush to Bill Clinton. From Clinton to George W. Bush. From W. to Barrack Obama. And from Barry to Don.  Man, that pendulum swings more than Benny Goodman ever did.

While we can’t predict the exact moment the pendulum will swing past the median point and deliver a victory for the left, the move away from DJT very well could have begun yesterday. It will only be in hindsight that our political scholars will pinpoint the timing exactly.
But we can posit based on the latest Presidential Medal of Freedom recipient,  our next president will be as liberal as Rush Limbaugh is conservative.
As for swings of momentum in your own life, it helps to have a physical object to be reminded of the power of physics to revise your own course on a regular basis. It also can act as a soothing escape during moments of stress and tension.*
*For those with heavy stress over the current political situation, a life-sized outdoor pendulum might be required.
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Complaining is good for you!

There’s a groundswell of opinion out there that unfettered positivity is the key to a happy, successful life. It’s been posited that those people who complain about their situations are digging a hole for themselves, a hole that leads to failure, social isolation, and death!

But what if these cheerful idiots are wrong?

As with most blanket pronouncements, their claim of constant conviviality is utter nonsense. Complaining is like perspiring. It’s part of human nature, and a necessary outlet for dealing with the stresses and strains of mortality. Life is hard, whether you’re a trash collector attempting to wake up at 4 am for your Thursday shift, or Nicole Kidman working hard to cling to the top of the Hollywood pecking order.

So if you feel guilty for not feeling constantly “happy” or “well-adjusted,” you have our permission to stop right now and let out a good, long sigh, followed by a string of choice expletives, some of which can be found here.

Give yourself license to let off some steam. Otherwise, when things really do go off the rails in your life, you won’t have the tools to deal with the problem successfully.*

*Of course, constant complaining can drive your friends and family mad, and eventually, cause them to evade your presence. Make sure you mix it up a little, and add self-effacing humor to your litany of problems, to give it that “universal feel.” And if you’re really down in the dumps, may we suggest a vacation here.

 

 

 

 

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Open your mind and let the spirits in!

Are you amenable to letting gods, extraterrestrials, and mythical beings into your space?Are you prepared for energy shifts? For dissociation from what people consider “reality?”  For images, color, words and light language to enter your consciousness?

The practice of channeling — a person’s body being taken over by a spirit for the purpose of communication — has been around for millennia. There are countless stories of shaman, witch doctors, prophets and others who claim to hear voices or receive some supernatural knowledge from the spirit world.  Channeling involves shifting your mind and mental space in order to achieve an expanded state of consciousness.

Think of it as plugging into a vast cosmic switchboard or tuning a radio to get a clear signal.  As you enter the spirit realm, you become receptive to higher frequencies.  Let the universe decide to deliver the message and you be the monitor so others can receive it.

This being the time of year when many people attempt to summon a certain mythical being in white beard and red suit, we recommend following these steps to increase your chance of success. First, research the god to find out his or her preferences. (Rooftop landing? Front door entrance? Place for reindeer to warm up?) Then place a statue or image of the god on your altar (In this case, hang a stocking by the chimney with care.) Finally, leave out a selection of the god’s favorite offerings (Why not put a selection of cookies on a nice plate for your mythical being.)

It also helps if you maintain the innocence of a four-year-old when summoning your god. They are much more likely to show up if you do!

Aside from the holidays, channeling is often stronger when you’re active – exercising, dancing, creating, walking in nature, meditating — and when focusing with heart and not logical mind. So go ahead and do whatever comes naturally, from toe-tapping to automatic drawing to full blown mania.*

*Some might question your behavior when summoning your gods and goddesses.  Ignore them.  They will soon learn that you have entered a higher realm of being, and wish to follow you there.  

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