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Stop and smell everything.  

As America continues to lead the world in racing from place to place, grasping at riches and attempting to stay busy for fear of missing out (on what, we’re not sure), we are reminded of an old adage that exhorts us to pause in our frenzy and actually acknowledge the moment we find ourselves in.

For that, we have a Mr. Walter Hagen to thank. The dapper Mr. Hagen was neither a Buddhist practitioner or a self-help author, but a seminal figure in the world of golf. His winning ways ushered in a world of riches for professional athletes, as he became the first to earn a million dollars playing a sport for a living.*

What he said was: “You’re only here for a short visit. Don’t hurry, don’t worry. And be sure to smell the flowers along the way. ”

Notice Hagen didn’t just choose roses to sniff. That’s a relief, as it gives us more opportunity to appreciate all flowers along the way. Jasmine, hyacinth, peony, wisteria: each deserves our undivided attention.

But why just limit your olfactory sense to flowers? To be truly awake and in the moment, we suggest you take a good whiff of everything that crosses your path.

We’re not just talking about the good smells either — a fresh-baked cherry pie cooling on the window ledge of Aunt Millicent’s kitchen, or that sweet huff of unleaded gasoline while you fill up at the Exxon station. Focus your nose on the questionable smells too, like a New York subway platform on a hot summer day, rotting fish left out to wither in the sun at the seafood market, even a freshly minted poop from your labradoodle Sadie. Such smells wake us up to the moment, and should not be pushed away just because we find them off-putting. They’re just as valuable in our ongoing education as the waft of evergreens in a forest or a demitasse of freshly made espresso.

And speaking of Sadie the labradoodle, you might notice just how devoted she is to smelling the world, whether it be a pant leg, a tree trunk, or a Goodyear steel-belted radial. Like all dogs, Sadie possesses up to 300 million olfactory receptors in her nose, compared to a mere 6 million in humans. And the part of a dog’s brain that is devoted to analyzing smells is, proportionally speaking, 40 times greater than ours. No wonder the cops are always walking a Labrador around the airport in search of the odd bag of cocaine.

So take your olfactory senses for a walk and get a whiff of everything. Though when sniffing fellow humans, be discreet. Some take offense if you get to close.  Even though it is only natural!

*Hagen once stated that he “never wanted to be a millionaire, just to live like one.” A fortunate man, he achieved both!

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This could be the day you meet someone new.

That’s what happened to a young man named Paul McCartney on this day in 1957.

A friend of his from the Liverpool Institute High School for Boys invited him to come check out a band called the Quarrymen, playing at St. Peter’s Church.  Now he could have said no, but he didn’t.   And if he had only shook hands with Eric Griffiths (guitar), Colin Hanton (drums), Rod Davies (banjo), Pete Shotton (washboard) or Len Garry (tea chest bass), then history wouldn’t have been written.

But he focused on the guy leading the band.  “He was singing ‘Come Go With Me,’ the Del-Vikings’ song, which I thought was fabulous until I realized they weren’t the right words,” recalled Paul.  “He was changing them. ‘Come go with me … down to the penitentiary’ — he was nicking folk-song words and chain-gang words and putting them into the Del-Vikings’ songs, a clever little bit of ingenuity.”

Why not take a cue from Paul and venture outside to meet someone new?  Who knows where it might lead?  Perhaps to the toppermost of the poppermost!

 

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Wear-a-Mask Wednesday: Thomas Paine

Who was the true author of American independence?

Many say Mr. Paine was the guy.  A radical writer who emigrated from England to America in 1774, his pamphlet Common Sense was read by every colonist questioning their fealty to Great Britain. No less a figure than John Adams was quoted as saying: “Without the pen of the author of Common Sense, the sword of Washington would have been raised in vain.”

Yet despite playing the greatest role in moving the American people from a spirit of rebellion to one of revolution, he was later ostracized due to his  ridicule of institutionalized religion in his seminal work The Age of Reason.  In fact, only 6 people attended his funeral in 1806.  It’s tough being a truly independent thinker.

And so, in honor of July 4th, here is Thomas Paine, SuperOptimist Extraordinaire, ready to adorn your visage.*

*But please remove before lighting any sparklers, crackling balls, killer bees, or wizard’s hats.

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Comfort is slavery.

As much as we all hope our plans amount to something, and we graduate to “the good life,” it can often prove to be a bust rather than a boon.

Why? Because once you’ve climbed those rungs of success, you’ll constantly be afraid that “the good life” will be taken away from you.

Here’s the antidote. Don’t just anticipate misfortune without flinching, fully embrace it when it arrives. See what you can make out of a bad grade, crap assignment, or shattered dream.

Then every lost wallet, dropped phone call, job dismissal, and broken bone will lose its ability to disrupt your life.  Suddenly, you’re able to feel at ease even when a shit storm arrives.  And they will, so be ready!

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Get yourself centered.

Taking on too many tasks during the day? Constantly checking your phone? Easily distracted?  Let us help you get centered once and for all.

“Centering” isn’t just another term for being focused.  There’s an actual physical center of the body, located just below the navel. In Qigong, it’s called the “lower dantian.” Concentrating on this center will help quiet your mind.  Once you’ve reduced the chatter in your head, you can get in touch with your badass higher self.

Then again, maybe you need a bigger shock to your system, something that will completely remove you from your current situation and give you what we call “Superoptimal Centering.”  In that case, pack a satchel, jump in the car and head to Lebanon, Kansas. Here you’ll find the geographical center of the 48 contiguous United States.  Just take US Highway 281 north 1 mile, and turn west on K-191.  Go for another mile until you see the marker at the end of the road.*

There’s very little to do once you get here.  And isn’t that the point?  Relax, slow down, sign the guest register and luxuriate in the great expanse that is the Sunflower State.  Just think: now nobody’s more centered than you!

*Note: the actual geographical center is about a half mile away, in the middle of a former hog farm.

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Wear-a-mask Wednesday: Channeling Mohandes.

On June 7, 1893, a young Indian lawyer was asked to vacate the first class compartment of a train because he was not white-skinned. He refused and told the railway officers that he would not go voluntarily, they would have to throw him out.  This act of standing up against injustice was, in effect, this holy man’s first act of civil disobedience.*

Even thought it’s not the exact anniversary of Gandhi’s first time speaking truth to power, it’s always a good day to channel the spirit of this activist for people’s rights. And independent thinking besides!

*He got what he asked for.  Gandhi was thrown out of the compartment, and his luggage was flung out too.  The train sped away, leaving him freezing outside the station.  However, he didn’t lose his front teeth in this encounter, that came later.

 

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Love your obstacles, for they are many.

Feeling stuck? Blocked? Like you’ve hit a brick wall?

You’re not alone. But rather than work yourself up into a froth, we suggest taking a page from Marcus Aurelius’ notebook.

True, it is a pretty old notebook. After all, Marcus was a Roman ruler back when you could count the centuries on two fingers. But that doesn’t mean he was ancient in his thinking. In fact, he was one of the first guys to carry around some papyrus and stylus and pen notes to himself to keep him on track.

It was his journaling, at first untitled, then known as “Marcus’ Writings to Himself,” and finally as the “Meditations”, where we gain our understanding of Stoicism, an early form of philosophy.

Stoicism sets out to remind us of how unpredictable the world can be, how brief our moment of life is, and that the source of our dissatisfaction lies in our view of the situation, not in the situation itself.  In fact, Marcus wrote to himself that any problem we might face could actually be opportunity in disguise.  As he put it: “The impediment to action advances action. What stands in the way becomes the way.”

In other words, everything is opportunity.  Even the brick wall that you’re currently banging your head against. So there’s no need to panic. Being stuck isn’t “bad.” It just is. By stepping back from self-flagellation and gazing at the problem dispassionately, you can begin to accept it. And in the acceptance comes growth.

So enjoy every blessed obstacle in your path, and they’ll return the favor by offering you a chance to overcome them!

 

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Feeling depressed? Try Nevada!

While recent events don’t point to an improvement in the mental health of the American people, we can take heart that the good folks in Nevada are on the upswing.

In fact, a recent survey showed that of all 50 states in the union, only Nevada showed a decline in their suicide rates.  And that’s cause for celebration!

To what can we attribute this positive development amidst the collective angst being experienced in the U.S.? Could it be the easy access to casinos? The legalized prostitution?  Well, sure!  But there’s more! The SuperOptimist has done some informal research, and among the advantages to bringing your personality disorder and bipolar tendencies to Nevada are the following:

  1. No state income tax.
  2. 300 sunny days a year.
  3. Short winters.
  4. Beautiful scenery.
  5. World class skiing.
  6. Las Vegas Aviators minor league baseball.
  7. Cheap flights in and out.
  8. Legal marijuana.
  9. Good star-gazing.
  10. Second highest percentage of UFO sightings in country.
  11. No fault divorce laws.
  12. Burning Man nearby.
  13. Snickers bars made here.

Feeling better now?  Just remember, if you do move here, you need to pronounce the name of the state correctly.  It’s Nev–AD–uh, not Nev-AH-duh.

See you there!

*One thing to be aware of: Schools rank dead last in the nation. So don’t come to Nevada looking to raise your IQ or hoping your children will become Rhodes Scholars. On the plus side, if you’re a good teacher you can really make a difference here!

 

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Wear-a-Mask Wednesday: Norma Desmond.

Whether you are in the mood for letting loose some pent-up histrionics, or just want to give voice to your delusions (whether they involve grandeur or something more problematic), here’s the mask for you.

The Norma Desmond model honors Gloria Swanson’s greatest achievement: her role as the reclusive silent film star in Billy Wilder’s classic film “Sunset Boulevard.”   It tells the story of the tragic affair between struggling Hollywood screenwriter Joe Gillis (played by William Holden) and an aging, forgotten actress who still believes she’s the greatest star of them all.

While you will be wearing a mask, the parallels between the actual Gloria Swanson and Norma Desmond were only too apparent. After starring in more than 70 Hollywood films and becoming the first actress to command a $1 million annual salary, Swanson’s star had diminished and her age had sidelined her from the bright lights for years.

Nor was she the director’s first choice for the role. Mae West, Mary Pickford, and Pola Negri all rejected the offer. At that point, Wilder thought of Swanson, and asked her to take a screen test.  To which Swanson replied: “What the hell do you have to test me for? You want to see if I’m still alive, do you? Or do you doubt that I can act?”But test she did, and was thrilled to get the part despite its nihilistic tone and unflinching critique of the business that had put her name in lights. (Wilder’s too.)

Upon completion of the picture, the reaction from the show business industry was mixed. As legend has it, studio head Louis B. Mayer confronted Wilder at the premiere of his film and bellowed,”You befouled your own nest! You have disgraced the industry that made and fed you. You should be tarred and feathered and run out of Hollywood, you goddam foreigner son of a bitch.” To which Wilder replied, “Why don’t you go fuck yourself?”

Of course, Mayer’s critique was not shared by the public. Today Sunset Boulevard ranks 16th on the American Film Institute’s list of the Greatest American Movies.

So put on the mask and act out with abandon.  Become a reclusive silent film star, or simply channel your inner thespian and take on whatever scene-stealing role suits your fancy.  After all, Swanson played many more roles than Norma throughout her fabulous career.  So can you!

Thanks to Joan Walter for requesting Ms. Desmond.  If you have a visage you’d like us to feature on Wear-a-Mask Wednesday, write us in the comments section below.  We’d be happy to oblige.

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Pineapple for everyone!

Nothing says “You’re welcome here!” like a pineapple — without question the most historically valid symbol of hospitality of any fruit or vegetable, and bursting with healthy goodness besides.

The first account of the pineapple was given by Christopher Columbus and his men, who landed on the island now known as Guadeloupe on their second voyage of discovery. One of the first things they saw was a pineapple (though they had no name for it).

Columbus brought the succulent fruit back to Europe in 1493. Its cylindrical shape and rough, spiky surface caused the Spaniards to name it “pina,” after the pine cone, although the pineapple is much larger by comparison. The English noted the same resemblance, but also liked apples, hence the word “pineapple.”

Spaniards began placing a pineapple at the entrance to a village as a sign of welcome. This symbolism spread to Europe, then to Colonial North America, where families would set a fresh pineapple in the middle of the table as a colorful centerpiece, especially when visitors joined them in celebration. The fruit would then be served as a special desert after the meal. Often when the visitor spent the night, he was given the bedroom that had pineapples intricately carved on the bedposts or atop the headboard — even if the bedroom belonged to the head of the household. Thus the phrase “I slept with the pineapples” means getting a good night’s rest.

Today, the medical community sings the praises of the pineapple, since it’s rich in vitamins, enzymes and antioxidants. A serving of pineapple contains 130% of your daily requirement of Vitamin C, as well as thiamin which assists the body in energy production. Pineapples also contain the anti-inflammatory enzyme Bromelain. What’s more, drinking pineapple juice is said to be five times more effective than cough syrup when you have a tickle in your throat. What’s not to like?

Shown above: British politician Margaret Thatcher holding up a pineapple for good luck during her 1978 campaign. It must have worked, as she won the election to become the first woman prime minister in the western world.

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